Sunday, June 29, 2014

Why I Need a Winch...

Yea, yea.
I hear you from all the way over there.

"You needed a what?!
 NEEDED?!"

I get the confusion.
It's a little out of the ordinary.

I mean, I'm a suburban housewife.
I have two three-year-old kids.
I like to bake cookies.
 I drool over purple vacuums at Costco.
I cut coupons and make grocery lists.

Regardless, I drive a lifted, lime green Jeep Rubicon that has 35" tires.
And that Rubicon now has a XRC-9.5 Gen 2 winch with synthetic line mounted onto the front bumper.


These are few reasons that I feel justify my latest purchase...

Why I Need a Winch
  1. Yanking out loose teeth
  2. Rescuing horses from quicksand
  3. Pulling my brother's truck out of the mud or whatever tiny hill it is stuck on
  4. Sledding fun!
  5. Fishing for great white sharks
  6. Zombie apocalypse
  7. Tightrope walking
  8. Demolition purposes
  9. Dragging the Cobra in and out of the garage
  10. Securing the Jeep to the house during the next hurricane
  11. Walking the dogs
  12. Practical jokes
  13. Stump removal
  14. Camping in a tent over the side of a cliff
  15. Cleaning out the chimney
  16. Rescuing cats from trees
  17. Flood insurance
  18. Ziplining
  19. Scaling volcanoes
  20. Temporary property boundaries
And those were just the top twenty that popped into my head.
I could have thought of at least 30 more, but I think I've made my point.
This winch was not just needed, it is a NECESSARY SURVIVAL TOOL.

So, now you know.

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